Self Control -Bishop FEB Idahosa

 Proverbs 25:28

He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls (KJV)

Proverbs 25:28

Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control (NIV)

Proverbs 25:28

A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls (NLT)

 

If you are going to focus and follow through on what you say, on your assignment, on your success, on the things that you want to achieve this year, you must be able to control yourself, control your spirit and control what is inside of you.

As we continue, keep in mind the story of the walls of Jericho that fell down in the bible, in order to have a picture of what we are talking about. The walls of Jericho fell down and the city was exposed. The children of Israel ran in and destroyed the city, broke it down, took whatever they needed to take from the city and the city lost everything.

What are the implication of the city that has no walls? When a city has no walls, it means there is no more protection for that city. It means anybody can just sort of run in and run out. It means anyone can just do anything they want to do; anyone can come in, steal and go out from any direction they want to.

Without walls, there is no predictability. That means you can enter from anywhere and leave from anywhere. People can come in and do whatever they want to do.

The bible is talking about how your mind, your body and your spirit should be like a city that has walls. If there are no walls, that means there is no self-control. If we have no control over our spirit, over what we do, over the ability to focus and follow through on things, that means we have no self-control; then we are like a city that has no walls.

Paul said in 1 Corinthians 9:27, “I beat my body into subjection.” In this bible passage, he was saying “I control myself.” In the New Living Translation, he put it this way “I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.”

How do we then train our body or our mind to do what it should do? When we don’t control ourselves or have no self-control we can’t really determine what happens in our lives. If you can control what happens today, you will determine what happens tomorrow.

There was a famous author in the 1830’s called Victor Hugo. He wrote a book titled, ‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’ and several other great books. One day his publisher met him and asked him to write the book ‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’ and gave him a deadline of twelve months. He eventually signed the contract with his publisher to write the book. But in the next twelve months he got himself involved in other activities and did not write the book. The publisher became angry with him and asked him why he didn’t write the book, but Victor Hugo gave him all kind of excuses. After this, the publisher gave him six more months and threatened that if he didn’t write the book within that period, the contract was off. The first month he was lost, but in the second month he told himself that if he didn’t do something drastic, he would lose the contract. So, he called his house help and gave him all his clothes and told him to lock it somewhere and shouldn’t let him know where he kept the clothes. The only thing he asked his house help to leave for him was a shawl. Because he had no more clothes to wear, he couldn’t go out, he could not entertain guest and he could not do anything at all. For the next five months, he sat down and he wrote his book. After four months (a month ahead of time), he finished the book and gave it to his publisher and that book became one of the most popular books ever written. The point of this whole story is this: if he didn’t do something drastic, he would probably have had the same result again.

If you can control what happens today, you can determine what happens tomorrow. Victor Hugo said because he had no clothes to wear, the distractions of going out and calling guest for party was gone. He had no other choice, but to write his book and finish it early. This was his own means of self-control; this was his own means of focus and following through.

If you need to do something drastic to achieve self-control, do it. It's lack of self-control that makes us not achieve the goals we set for ourselves at the beginning of every year. Many of us get to the end of the year and start regretting over things we should have achieved in the year, but which we didn’t.

Self-control is so important that Paul described it as one of the fruit of the Spirit. This means that if you have the Holy Spirit in your life, one of the way we would be able to know, is when you can control your spirit and yourself. That is why Proverbs 25:28 says that “a city that has no walls is as a bad as a man that has no self-control.” This is because that man cannot control what comes in and what goes out. Such a man cannot control what happens around him because he is like a city that has no walls. Such a city can be overrun; that is how bad it can be for us if we don’t have self-control.

So, how do we have self-control then? The Holy Spirit gives us the ability and power to have self-control. Self-control is an important part of been able to do what you determine to do and the Holy Spirit is the one that gives you the power and the ability to control your spirit and yourself. It’s the Spirit that controls your life and it’s your life that we see.

If you don’t follow through on your thoughts, your activities and the things that you promise to do, then we can say that you don’t have self-control and that you are like a city without walls. If you can control what happens today, you can actually determine what happens tomorrow.

What is it that prevents us from having self-control? What is it that prevents us from having that following through? Self-control begins with self-understanding. You must understand yourself, you must understand your mind and understand what you are doing. Know what circumstances and things that causes you to do certain things. There is a phrase called ‘Time Inconsistency’ that is used by economist. It simply means this: it refers to the tendency of your brain to want to value the immediate rewards over the long-term benefits. It means when you make plans for the future, your brain says yes and you are very excited (these are long term goals), long term goals are exciting at the beginning, but because of time inconsistency, we tend to value the immediate rewards over long term goals. That is when it comes to action that will give the long term goal, your brains says, ‘what‘s the reward here?’ and tells you to look for and pursue the immediate reward and leave the long term goals. A good example is that of a child: you show him a biscuit and tell him the biscuit is for his lunch at school the next day, but because the child has seen the biscuit, he would want to go for the immediate reward (which is to the eat biscuit now). The long term goal is for the child to eat the biscuit in school the next day at lunch time when he is hungry, but as long as the child has seen the biscuit, he will want to go for the immediate gratification of eating the biscuit now (which makes him happy now).

Another good example is in marriage. On the wedding day, marriage vows are taken (which are long term goal), but when the immediate problems comes, it’s what happens now that your mind tends to value more. This is the reason why people could be unfaithful. This is the reason why people gets into physical abuse in marriage. It’s the immediate gratification that causes all these.

The mind tends to value short term gains, over long term gains.  So, how do you solve that? Find a way to strengthen your long term gains. Give yourself a ‘commitment device.’ Find something that will make you do the long term things over the short term ones. A child for example that will eat his biscuit at lunch in school tomorrow instead of today is doing what is called ‘delayed gratification.’ That child has the mind that can potentially do well in the future. The ability to delay your present gratification and wait for the longer term gain, shows that you have a good plan in front of you. Once again, if you can control what happens today, you can determine what happens tomorrow. If you don’t do that, then you will have issues. How do you that? Find a thing that can help you or create a system that will make it easier for you to stick to your commitment. For example you want to lose weight: buy smaller plates and put less food, this will trick your mind to eat less. Add all the things together that will help you achieve the long term goals. Find ways to control things in the short term. Find systems that will strengthen your long term goals. Find things that will help you build self-control. The Holy Spirit will help you  build self-control. If you can control what happens today, then you are becoming an architect of your future and not a victim of your present.

A lot of times we blame the devil and other people for what happens in our lives. We cannot blame other people for the things that we choose not to control today. Control your present, create your future. Be the architect of that which happens in your tomorrow, not a victim of that which happens today.

Galatians 5:22-23 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and SELF-CONTROL.” Strengthen your long term goal. Keep your mind on your long term goal. Paul said in Philippians 3:14, “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”  Paul kept his mind on the prize.

For you to achieve your goals in 2021 you must have self-control and for you to have self-control, you must have the Holy Spirit. Don’t be like a city that have no walls or whose walls has been broken down. Without walls been strengthened, anything can happen. So, build your walls. Find things today that will strengthen your resolve to achieve your goals in 2021. You must be successful next year in the Name of Jesus. You must come out better and stronger in the Name of Jesus. Find things that will strengthen your long term goals.

One thing that we have problem with when it comes to our future and control is: ‘the problem with starting is starting.’ The problem with starting a new habit is starting. Once you can find yourself starting a project or an activity, you will find it a lot easier to continue. So, how do you do that? Find the ways to reduce the stress of starting. In our mind starting a project might look so big and then we begin to put all the obstacles on our way by ourselves and we start making excuses not to start. So, what you can do then is this: you count the cost and then find out what you will need to start and what you will need to continue. You don’t need to have everything at once for you to start. If you think you must do all at once before you start, then it’s a problem. Get the things you need that will get you started and then plan a way to continue. If you have that, I promise you the work will go a lot easier than you think.

Self-control is what you need to be able to focus and follow through. If you want to do a thing, find the small part that will break it down. Find the small parts and put them together; this is how you focus and follow through. As I said earlier, if you can control what happens today, you can determine what happens tomorrow. In 2021, learn to determine what happens today, so that you can control what happens tomorrow ahead of time. Do these things, put them in your mind, start thinking all about these things and you will be able to focus and follow through. You see, life is a game of focus. You wonder how some people are able to achieve so many things; it’s not because that person is able to do so many things, it’s because that person is able to focus on one of them and they can follow through and when that one is doing well, they find another one to focus on and follow through; that is how they are able to achieve things. This will be your portion this year in the Name of Jesus. This year 2021 will not end without you achieving in the Name of Jesus.

Focus and follow through. Find your gold. Find your achievement. Let me give you an illustration using three swings. If you focus on each one of them, one at a time, then push and follow through, you will in no time get all three swings swinging very well, with less effort and energy.

If you learn to focus and follow through on your goals one per time, you will achieve more and use less energy.  Do not be like a city that has no walls and no self-control. Remember I have told you that it’s the Holy Spirit that gives you the power to control your spirit. He is the one that gives you the strength to focus and make sure that everything you do is achieved. You must be determined with your goals. Be determined with your future. Be determined to achieve all your goals in 2021. If you are not  determined, you won’t be able to achieve the goals you have set for yourself. Let us be the ones who focus and who follow through. 

Prayer For You:

You are going to be successful in Jesus Name. God will give you the wisdom, the knowledge, the strength and the determination to follow through in the Name of Jesus. I pray that God’s grace will give you wisdom to focus and to follow through in the Name of Jesus. I pray that God will you the grace to discipline your body like an athlete, to make it do what you tell it to do in the Name of Jesus. I pray that the stress of starting will not be your portion in the Name of Jesus. I pray for you that the stress of pursuing things left and right will not be you portion in the Name of Jesus. I pray that God will make it easier for you to have systems around you that will make you stick to your commitments in the Name of Jesus. When you make plans in 2021, God will put His signature and approval over it in the Name of Jesus. I pray for you that this year will end and you will have no regrets and you will enter next year with confidence in the Name of Jesus.